Coulda Shoulda Woulda

Debi thought my comment on her post was funny, so she changed that post and wrote a new one, linking me again. So......

When I finished my dive in the chamber yesterday, I grabbed my wadded up clothes and was going to the bathroom to change. I had my hand on the door handle when the guy said Hey you dropped something. I was so hoping it would be a sock. But no, of course it was my underwear. A little pair of purple lace panties. Right there, in the middle of the floor, in a room filled only with men. I thought I was going to die right there on the spot.

There were so many things I coulda shoulda woulda done.

My eighty-four year old, really-still-hot friend woulda smiled and said, ever so sweetly, Hell fire, Daaaaarlin'! Those aren't mine. I only wear thongs.

I shoulda said something funny like Liar, liar pants on fire! Or I coulda sung that old song that goes something like... I see London; I see France. I see someone's underpants.

I wish I woulda slung them around my head a few times and shot them in the air.

Instead, I said nothing. Nothing at all.

My eyes got huge, my mouth was open wide, but nothing came out. I just slinked over there and picked them up, with the whole room watching. I was just grateful that they weren't big old granny panties.

When I was leaving, I heard him yell out Mrs. L, have a grreeeeaaaaat weekend!